The Love Languages of a Heart-led Celebrant
When I first came across the five languages, I knew straight away that mine were: Quality Time and Physical Touch. I love hugs, and if I value a person I show that by spending quality time with them whether in person or on the phone/video call. Time is precious, and if I’m spending it with you it’s the number one indicator that I like you. Conveniently, my husband shares the same top two love languages.
I have friends whose love language is gift giving. It’s really lovely receiving their gifts but it’s not my love language so when I am expressing love back it’s not likely to come in a package. I do sometimes wonder if that makes them feels less loved! I must get my act together!
A long walk together or enjoying a cuppa or meal, yes. And definitely a hug. That’s how I love.
A friend once said to me that they were surprised Words of Affirmation wasn’t one of mine given I write books and ceremonies. “Yeah, you’d think that, wouldn’t you?”
I remember, decades ago, having a colleague who often spoke of his confusion post divorce. “She said she didn’t feel loved but I mowed the lawn, took out the rubbish…” and so his list went on. Even though I’d not heard of love languages back then, I could tell straight away that they were communicating love differently. He was showing her through actions. Perhaps she would have felt loved if he said “I love you” or “you look fabulous in that sundress” or “you’re doing really great at….” or if he bought her a gift or walked hand in hand with her down the street or whatever her love language needed.
The Five Love Languages
Acts of Service
Receiving of Gifts
Physical Touch
Words of Affirmation
Quality Time
In an ideal world, we don’t just have one or two love languages but are fluent in giving and receiving each one. I’m working on the words of affirmation, gift giving and acts of service! I think the latter comes naturally to me but I don’t resonate with it in terms of showing love.
You might have heard about love languages before, but have you ever considered what yours might be as a Heart-led Celebrant? You might naturally take one of the five oft-mentioned love languages into your work. Do you recognise how you give and receive love?
I’ve created an expanded list below to give you pause for thought about what it is you offer your clients (or might offer them if you’ve yet to train or be certified by us).
Creativity
Acting with Integrity
Acceptance
Curiosity
Stillness
Validation
Play
Collaboration
Shared Experiences
Really listening
Undivided attention
Hostessing
Humour
Creator of Sacred Spaces
Co-regulation
Empathy
Storyteller
Heart of Gold
Sharing Beauty
Shared Beliefs
Intentionality
Bestowing
I’d love to hear your thoughts on this topic both personally and professionally as a celebrant.
